Mr. Carey, sir
I was just reading over some old entries like I usually do when I get bored and I just realized something. Ha, I usually do that, too.
I remember when every day felt so worthless, because I wanted someone to hold me. I remember what it felt like to lay in bed and cry, what it felt like to yearn for something that I thought I'd never have. And now that I have it, I have nothing to come here and get off my chest. I don't come to livejournal with my problems anymore, because that was my problem. Everything else seems so tiny when I'm with Lenny. He really belittles my pain into almost nothing. He REALLY did fill a void, and I feel so amazing and appreciative of him that I can't hold back my tears. I am so in love with him, for everything he's done for me, and I hope that everything I do for him is enough to return this. I hope that we stay together, and I hope that more people in the world would stop and really appreciate their relationship for what it really is. If it really isn't anything, it's not worth it..if you look back and honestly can say that not one day with that person was worth it, it's not worth it. I think that every bad relationship has a chance of coming back, but people don't care about feelings anymore, they want a fast paced world and with that world comes no time to sit and actually think about how they feel. I just took literally 10 mins and even though Lenny and I weren't having any problems, I feel like I just fell in love with him all over again. It's absolutely astonishing, he has indeed become my world and without him, I may go back into feeling worthless..and even with that being said, I would never want to do anything to keep Lenny with me just because I'm afraid of being alone, I'll only be with him because we're both happy.
It's too bad he's at work right now. I love you, Lenny..